cycle

It's been a month since my last blog post; time flies by so quickly. This month has been stressful and tiring, but perhaps it's also been fulfilling and meaningful in someone else's eyes.

I've been incredibly busy lately, with so many things to do. Time will always come, but my mental state isn't always able to keep up. One task after another, endless projects, is a huge mental strain. A rational mind can complete plans on paper, but my emotional self isn't a perpetual motion machine. When there are more than two priorities in life, there's no real focus; it's just about getting things done.
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We always think the next step is the end, but we keep going in a cycle. There are always so many things to do, but no time to actually do them.

Graduation is next week. Four years of university have been incredibly busy; I accomplished a lot, but it also feels like I lost a lot. Looking back on my senior year, I didn't really achieve anything; I was just coasting along, and I became increasingly restless. Today, failing my graduation project was a heavy blow, understandable yet incredibly disheartening. Even I wasn't satisfied with the subpar product I produced in two days, but the system's extensive practical application and the published articles made me realize that failure was impossible. Thinking back to this time last year, I participated in a competition brimming with confidence, only to fail due to my own carelessness and arrogance. It's ironic that this situation has repeated itself.

In two months I'll be starting my life in the US. If I don't change my mindset, things will decline drastically.

I need a few days to catch my breath, to make a change, to rest and adjust my mindset. Leave everything behind and start tomorrow afresh. After finishing up graduation stuff at the end of the month…